🤦‍♀️ 10 How Lose A Guy In 10 Days Outfits

Ever feel like your closet is secretly plotting against your love life?

Maybe you’re not trying to ditch a guy, but your fashion choices are doing the heavy lifting anyway. Or perhaps you’re on a mission to ensure that second date just doesn’t happen.

If so, you’ve landed in the right place. We’re serving up the ultimate guide to fashion faux pas designed to send him running for the hills, all in good fun, of course.

1. The ‘Too Much Everything’ Ensemble

• Best For: First dates you’d rather not repeat
• Vibe: Overwhelmed maximalist
• Why it works: It leaves no room for imagination or comfort, for either of you.

Layer on the loudest animal prints you own, then add a chunky statement necklace, oversized earrings, and a hat with a feather. Don’t forget the clashing patterned tights and a pair of platform sneakers. You’re basically a walking art installation, just not the good kind.

Pro Tip: Accessorize with a tiny, squeaky purse that makes noise every time you move.

2. The ‘Laundry Day Special’

• Best For: Impromptu meet-ups where “zero effort” is the goal
• Vibe: Utterly unbothered (and slightly unwashed)
• Why it works: It proudly declares that laundry is a suggestion, not a requirement.

Pull on those faded sweatpants with the suspicious stain from last week’s pizza night. Pair them with an old band tee riddled with tiny holes, and definitely don’t bother with a bra. Mismatched socks are a must, ideally one with a cartoon character.

Pro Tip: Casually mention you “just threw this on” after searching for clean clothes for an hour.

3. The ‘Confused Cosplay’

• Best For: Sending signals so mixed, they’re practically a smoothie
• Vibe: “Is it Halloween?”
• Why it works: He won’t know whether to ask for your number or your autograph.

Show up in a full-on anime character outfit, complete with a brightly colored wig and oversized props. Or maybe go for a medieval tunic and cloak on a casual coffee date. It’s about commitment to a theme no one else understands.

Pro Tip: Stay in character the entire date, speaking only in a fantasy accent.

4. The ‘Business Casual But Make It Chaotic’

• Best For: Any event requiring a modicum of professionalism
• Vibe: Corporate rebel gone rogue
• Why it works: It blends formal and informal in the most jarring, uncomfortable way.

Start with a crisp white button-down, but wear it backwards or inside out. Pair it with dress pants, then add neon green fuzzy slippers. Top it off with a tie worn as a headband and a fanny pack slung across your chest. You’re making a statement, just not a good one.

Pro Tip: Carry a clipboard and occasionally jot down “important notes” about your surroundings.

5. The ‘Overly Themed Holiday Attire’

• Best For: Dates far, far away from any actual holiday
• Vibe: Festive, but aggressively off-season
• Why it works: It screams, “I only own seasonal clothing,” or “I forgot what month it is.”

Rock a full-blown Christmas sweater with jingle bells in July, or a neon green St. Patrick’s Day shirt in October. Think sparkly shamrocks and Santa hats when the weather is clearly not cooperating. Bonus points for holiday-themed socks.

Pro Tip: Hum “Jingle Bell Rock” under your breath throughout the evening.

6. The ‘Too Tight, Too Short, Too Sheer’ Trifecta

• Best For: Making everyone around you deeply uncomfortable
• Vibe: Desperately trying too hard
• Why it works: It’s less about allure and more about alarm, ensuring he keeps his distance.

Squeeze into a bandage dress two sizes too small, paired with a skirt barely covering anything. Throw on a top so sheer it leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination. Every movement feels like a wardrobe malfunction waiting to happen. Comfort is a foreign concept here.

Pro Tip: Walk like you’re encased in concrete to emphasize the struggle.

7. The ‘Pajamas Are People Too’ Look

• Best For: Literally any public outing where you want to confuse onlookers
• Vibe: Just rolled out of bed (because you did)
• Why it works: It’s the ultimate declaration of “I don’t care about anything but my own comfort.”

Step out in your favorite silk pajama set, complete with fluffy slippers. Drape a bathrobe over it as outerwear, and definitely leave your hair in a messy bun from yesterday. Bedhead is a key accessory for this daring look.

Pro Tip: Carry a travel pillow and yawn dramatically every five minutes.

8. The ‘Vintage Store Mishap’

• Best For: Trying to be unique and failing spectacularly
• Vibe: Unintentionally retro gone wrong
• Why it works: It looks like you got dressed in the dark in an antique shop’s bargain bin.

Combine a polyester leisure suit from the 70s with shoulder pads from the 80s and clogs from the 90s. Make sure nothing actually matches or fits properly. The goal is a chaotic clash of decades and questionable fashion choices, all at once.

Pro Tip: Tell him each piece has a “story” but refuse to elaborate on any of them.

9. The ‘Sporty Spice But Make It Grunge’

• Best For: Confusing athletic intentions with existential dread
• Vibe: Post-workout, pre-apocalypse
• Why it works: It’s an aesthetic clash of epic proportions that no one asked for.

Pair a pristine tennis skirt with ripped fishnets and chunky combat boots. Throw on an oversized, faded band hoodie over a neon sports bra. You’re ready for a marathon, a mosh pit, or maybe just to confuse everyone you encounter.

Pro Tip: Carry a rusty skateboard, even if you can’t ride it.

10. The ‘Excessive Logos Everywhere’

• Best For: Subtlety-averse brand ambassadors
• Vibe: Walking billboard
• Why it works: It yells, “I’m expensive and have no original thought,” loud and clear.

Deck yourself out head-to-toe in designer logos, real or fake, it doesn’t matter. Think a branded baseball cap, a logo-covered track suit, and a fanny pack plastered with emblems. Every item screams its brand, leaving no room for personal style.

Pro Tip: Casually mention the exorbitant price of each item, unprompted, at least three times.

Our Top Recommended Finds

• A reliable lint roller: Because you’ll need to remove all the evidence of your fashion crimes before changing into something normal.
• A comfy robe: For when you inevitably ditch the uncomfortable outfit the moment you get home.
• A good humor book: To remind you that fashion is fun, even when it’s spectacularly bad.

Which of these will you try first?

So, ready to embrace your inner fashion saboteur and make a lasting (and probably confusing) impression?

Which of these style statements are you going to rock first to ensure that second date never happens?